Things to do before baby Cristancho comes

I have to admit... I haven't exactly been a very committed blogger lately.  It's been what? two weeks? Although you might disagree,  I have a very good twofold excuse:  First, we had guests and second, it's been craaaazzzyy at work, which strongly limits my appetite for computer time when I get home.  

I won't really talk much about life at work though.  I can only say that everybody decided at the same time that they needed to spend their money.  You see, in the corporate budget world... either you spend it or you loose it. Which means that we... the professional "spenders"  have to freakiiiinnnggg rush to get everything done properly when all of our business customers start spending... it's kind of like Christmas starting October! But instead of nice red wrapped gift you go for industrial goods or services.  :)  

Anyway... let's get into happier subject matters.  Introducing our guests:  Oscar, his wife Andrea and little Pipe.  And I have to say that these guys are the perfect guests! They are super nice, super neat and we had a great time together. I used to work with Oscar long time ago in Colombia.  Since then we have kept in touch, and they've always wanted to move to Canada.  Oscar is a petroleum engineer... so what better city to move to than Calgary?  Well, they will finally be arriving next spring.  So two weeks ago they came to see the city and to get an idea about neighborhoods, daycares and other stuff before doing the final move. 

Here is everybody (including Duna), in Banff.

Anyway, it was again a great opportunity to experience first hand how much the addition of a little one changes a couple's life. Since my last blog some of my friends have volunteered ideas of things Tavo and I need to take time to appreciate before baby Cristancho arrives (that's blog research people!- I am doing my homework).  And I've been waiting two weeks to share them with you, my faithful readers!! - well... you probably already read them if you are in fb, but still... they are so cool I had to use them today. 

Here they go (another top ten):

1. Being able to eat together (not in turns) and eat when food is still hot.  - This was from the last blog.
2. A hot shower lasting more than 5 minutes without little people, or your screaming husband outside your door.
3. Peering without and audience.  - Although I've gotten used to having a dog and cat as audience. 
4. Wearing your hair down and not worrying about little fists pulling it out in clumps (you will be surprised with how many variations of the standard pony tail you can come up with!) - by the way, I think the same applies with long hanging jewelry...
 5. Carrying a small purse that you can actually zip up because it is not crammed full of diapers, wipes, toys, bottles, snacks and the like...
6. Going to a mall and actually have more than 15 minutes uninterrupted shopping.
7. Sleeping in on Saturdays (yes I know... I did mention that a couple times already... but I just can't get over it)
8. Taking the time to be tired after work...
9. Not going into total worrying shock because you forgot to bring an extra set of pants in case little one has an "accident".
10. And my final favorite learned after a week of hanging out with a potty training toddler: Enjoy not having to leave everything and anything you are doing when you hear the magic words: mommy, pipi !

Fun uh?  One of my friends in her total wisdom said the point is to "be excited for the wonderful journey of parenthood but enjoy the every day little things until then!"  And this comes from a mother of twins... so we all have to take it very seriously.

And with that thought I leave you. Oh well... maybe not... two updates before I do (leave you).

1.  Have tried to get some info out of the nice ladies at the Colombian government - ICBF- about how long this waiting might take... (it's been two months since we were approved); but they are extremely good at saying nothing... with a lot of nice words.  The common theme in every conversation is: patience
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2.  My company decided to deny again my petition to have the same rights as a tummy mommy would.  I have to admit I was pretty sad about it and ignored the e-mail for about a week.  However,  sad became mad and mad prompted some ideas. It is not over!!! She's baaaacckkkk...

Until next post,

Luz M.

A Veggie Afternoon & Okotoks in the Company of Family

I was supposed to write about Hello Kitty today but then, I started thinking that I need the people in my pictures as well as the cat... I know, it sounds a bit complicated Winnie the Pooh,  Hello Kitty... etc etc... but I guess you will all understand next week.

So last minute I decided to change the subject to our two main week-end activities: My veggie afternoon (Saturday) and Okotoks (Sunday). 

My Veggie Afternoon

About a year ago Tavo and I decided to go through this body "cleansing" program.  In a couple of words,  the program involved a lot of celery, grapes and papaya... for about... a month.  Oh yeah... it was hard. We mainly did it for health reasons but I can tell you that in three weeks I was pretty much swimming in my own pants... and Tavo was even worst (why do men loose weight faster than women... why? WHY?) ...

Anyway, the result of our little experiment is that we ended up becoming vegans; read people that do not eat any (yes any!) animal product.  No even my beloved ice cream or milk chocolate. And if you are Colombian, and you are reading this, you might be thinking I'm totally denying my own identify, my "food" heritage... BUT so we did.  Shame on us!! : )

To be honest, after a month we didn't even miss our "regular" food.  You have no idea all you can do with veggies and soy!! Add some almond milk, rice cheese, beans (all kinds) and believe it or not you are kinda of set.  Food actually became a discovery of new ingredients and flavors, quite different than our Criolla cousine. That's until we discovered I was low in iron. Doctor recommended: fish.  So we re-added it to our diet.  And I didn't push back AT ALL because I LOVE seafood!!

So we were semi-vegans for about 8-10 months more.  That's when I started to get very busy at work and due to convenience factors ended up adding chicken and turkey to the mix.  I must say... I am not very proud of myself. Do you all know what they do to chickens and turkeys before they hit your table?! Very ugly things...specially in developed countries. 

However, we decided to take another try at it, not going all the way to vegans and just sticking to vegetarians that eat fish. I am not giving up my seafood!  At least vegetarians eat cheese and eggs. We'll have to do without all the hormones that they put on chicken... don't worry... we'll survive!

This brings me to my Saturday afternoon, when I got together with two wonderful ladies to explore some vegetarian recipes.  First, introducing Karen. 
- As side note... she was complaining about not remembering the recipe if she drank too much wine... uh... dear... you brought three copies of the recipes... remember?

And my next friend, Bianca.  She cheated by bringing her stuff almost done.  After eating it I figured she was just trying to hide the recipe from us so that we can't copy it.  : )  Nahh... but it was delicious!

 Ok. Here's the menu:

Starts

• Vegetable soup on coconut milk
• Vegetarian brushetas based on fresh tomatoes & black olives

Main Dishes - Entrees

• Garlicky roasted potato salad with wilted kale and tahini dressing - The kind just melt in your mouth!
• Ginger tofu 
• Chinese five-spice rice
• Rice with sunflower sauce, spinash and a bit of ginger flavor

Dessert

• Apple pie with soy vanilla ice cream on top

 Any complains about being vegetarian?! Are you kidding?! We had a great meal... and so did Tavo when he came back from walking the dog and got to eat a lot of left overs.

Didn't  mean to make you hungry or anything... so I'll move on fast to our Sunday; not leaving you without a thought... what will our baby think about not having "Carnita Asada" or "Bandeja Paisa" or "Mute Santandereano"? All very delicious but very non-vegetarian?  Hopefully he/she will be so excited about us and moving to Canada that he/she won't miss that Colombian food.  ; )

Okotoks (Sunday) 

I won't make this part very long as you probably have plans to hit the kitchen soon.  All I can say is that we needed to loose some of the calories from the day before and decided to take a drive and walk to a small city close to Calgary (and it's surroundings) called Okotoks.  Here are some pics: 

The three of us in Sheep River Falls. It took us about 7 shots to at least get Duna to sit looking to the front.   
 

The four ladies in front of the giant rock that was brought to this place by a glacier from the Rocky Mountains.  (wow!)

As you can see, the "little" rolls are not so little... 
 

Ok there is an explanation for this picture.  It was supposed to be a nice group pic with Tavo and Duna... until our cute pet decided to jump on top of me, and I totally lost my balance.  Obviously... the pic didn't quite work as planed but I thought I share it anyway!

Somebody said cute pet?

Can't wait to take our baby to our Sunday adventures. 

Until next post, 

LuzM.

A B-day to Celebrate (and two others to come)

Ok ok... I know I'm late in writing again.  I'm latin... lateness is in my blood... it's like this: nucleus(25%), red cells (15%), white cells (15%), late cells (10%), other stuff (10%) - there goes my high-school biology class.  My teacher would be so proud! The funny thing is, people who didn't use to read my blog, wrote me one of those nasty-mails at 9:00 am on monday morning - "so what's up with the blog?"  Yes... you know who you are... and you're late too most of the times as well! : )

But let's get into the subject matter at hand.  This past week there was an important event in the family.  My little cousin, Ana Maria, who by the way, lives here in Calgary, celebrated her 9th B-day.  Tavo, Duna and I were invited to celebrate with her.  You might wonder why Milu wasn't invited but as I shared on a previous blog, she doesn't enjoy crowds, specially "crowds" where there might be more than two kids.  Therefore,  active participation in Ana Maria's B-day celebration was out of the question.  

You see, Ana Maria has a sister and a little brother - read the "crowd" - both of which will be introduced to my loyal readers at their respective b-days, which will be happening during the upcoming months (yes, two others to come).

If you think about it, these kids will play a very important role in our future baby's life.  They are the "cousins", and anybody who grew up in Colombia knows that "the cousins" are supposed to be the first group of friends in your life.  Most of us experienced more than one or two "very intimate" gatherings on a Sunday afternoon at grandma's or at an aunt's place, in the company of about 70 of your closest family members, for which the cousins category accounted for 80% of the people involved.  Yup, many many cousins.  Besides,  you're supposed to grow up with the cousins, go party with the cousins... etc etc.  So imagine the potential!! Therefore... to put in corporate words;  we are cultivating future key relationships and doing some preliminary networking - proactively.   : )

Anyway, this is Ana Maria showing off her new hoody. 

And this is a picture of all of us right before presents were opened and cake was eaten!

And now... see the looove for the camera? Nose kiss! :)

And this is the beautiful dress Ana got from us. 

But to end on a familiar note, a list. 


5 Things Ana Maria and Me Have in Common

1. Our beautiful curly hair.  - Although I must say I have like 2.5 curls for every one she has. Consequently she doesn't get my famous "lion king" look so much as I do.  Lucky her for that!.
2. We loooove chocolate.  -  Notice the chocolate cake on the picture above? Did you think I was able to resist a piece? do you, do you?  Yeah you're right... I didn't.  No will power when it comes to chocolate.  None!!
3. We're both very smart ladies. - (And so humble!! ha ha) No but really, she's a very good student, very disciplined.
4. We're so very stylish! -  (and must I repeat,  so humble!!) I must say she's a 9 year old totally fashion sensitive. If you knew her you could easily picture her at 18 wearing the coolest skirt and latest 12 in heels available.  Oh dear... my uncle is in so much trouble!

It's all about the matching. Get it?  (even if your little brother doesn't get it... let's not let him ruin your style).

5. We love Shakira... and we do believe that hips don't lie.  : )

Until next post, 

LuzM

My Quest for Justice

Part I
This is the story about a Colombian girl who wanted to move to Canada.  She met a Colombian boy who wanted to marry her and move North with her.  They did... (yes both, get married and move to a new country).  They quit their jobs, sold their furniture, packed two suitcases and their Colombian cat, and took a flight to a new life.  It was supposed to be easy, they would make it in no time. (yeahhh right!)

They quickly found out that starting a life in a new country wasn't easy... they got themselves a one bedroom apartment in the "immigrants" side of town... not exactly the best neighborhood, but hey... cozy enough to get by.  - Yup, that's me in our new place... "unpacking" all of our belongings. - Oh! and the "mattress" in the back was a loan...  anyway...

Tavo worked long hours, while I studied.  It was hard work and long hours for both of us but at the same time... it was kinda of  fun.  We didn't worry about money... because there was NO money!!  Just enough for rent and food. We were soooo broke I was happy I packed a lot of underwear when we left Colombia.  And of course.... there was the weather!! Do you think is easy for a Colombian to adjust to Canadian type of weather?! Let me tell you something.  Cold in Colombia is in a bad day,  in the coldest city,  maybe -3 to -5 Celsius.  Far (very very far) from the Canadian minus thirties.  Those temperatures are just unthinkable for a Colombian.  But then again... ice skating wasn't so expensive, so besides our toes going a shade of blue... it was sort of "cool".

Anyway... year after year life got better. I finished university and we both got a decent job.  We both love Colombia but Canada became "home".  The winter still comes back every year... but so does the summer! So our heart is really big enough for two countries to fit comfortable together. 

Yeap, that's us the day we became Canadian Citizens. (Nothing more Canadian than a Mountie eh?!)
We were both very proud and happy.  So, we celebrate Canada Day and 20 de Julio; we still sing "ven, ven ven... ven a nuestras almas, Jesus ven ven, ven ven" in Christmas and get presents from el nino Dios and Santa.  That's more presents for everyone, so why not?

The funny thing is I hardly ever felt discriminated against for being an immigrant. For having an accent or struggling with French or English.  That is the beauty about Canada.  You are not expected to stop being yourself and your differences are actually welcomed. 

Part II
So this is the story about a Colombian/Canadian girl who married a Colombian/Canadian boy.  They decided to grow their family through adoption.  The funny thing is, you see,  in the land of welcoming differences,  adoptive mothers are not considered to have the same rights as mothers that give birth to a child.  At least in what it concerns legal maternity/parental benefits.  Which is a boomer when you consider that most companies base their maternity/paternity leave and benefits in the standing law.  The company that I work for, being one of them. 

This company, although a good company to work for, has different rules and benefits for adoptive mothers or "natural" mothers.  But let's not get into the "naturality" of things for now.  I don't even think that's a word but bear with me for now. 

That's when my quest for justice started. (More draaamaaa!!)

The first step: Writing  to my HR department a very articulate letter (by the way, I made sure there were no spelling mistakes on that one!) with copy to my boss, my boss's boss and my boss's boss's boss.  In a summary, I requested to have the same benefits as belly-mommys do.  The result of that first letter read something like: Dear Mrs. Jaimes,  congratulations on the future addition to your family, however, we regret to inform you... blah blah blah. 

Strangely enough, I was not at all shocked.  I was thinking... well... you just described what the policy says... and I read the policy already... and the policy is wrong. 
So what does a nice girl like me do when someone says no to something I strongly believe in?  I get back into working on it,  a bit harder.  : )   Of course... that's me.   As long as I keep it professional, I have nothing to loose... so why not?

The second step: Request a meeting with my boss's boss's boss's boss.  I tell him the story about our family.  He sympathizes and recommends we bring HR to a future meeting and I can talk to them about my request.  So I organize the meeting. 

The third step:  The day for the meeting arrives.  I present my case to my HR rep but the lady who recommends changes to policies never makes it to the meeting.  My HR rep takes notes and asks me to send him a summary of my request and the justification behind it.  It kinda of feels I'm not getting anywhere... but then again... I got to dance the dance of corporate chain of command.  

So I'm working on my fourth step. The summary e-mail that will help my HR rep to present my case to the policy team.  The good part is I got myself an awesome team to help me.  These two ladies helping me write these letters are two of the smartest cookies in town... one of them is a lawyer so she provides the "legal" view and the other one has negotiated some of the biggest deals in the company so she provides the right corporate "persuasion".  And most of all, they both keep me from getting too emotional... which I tend to do when something really matters.  And they will both get chocolates this Christmas... (from el nino Dios which is even cooler)..
Anyway, this is really women power people!!  Brains and of course... beauty.. (yes they are both totally hot!) ha ha!!
- And for my single male friends out there; sorry but they are both taken..-  What? did you think women like that go around and about lonely for a long time? You kidding?

Oh and the question about how there are "natural" and ... what "un-natural" mothers! Give me a break!! Haven't you watch the discovery channel?! Many species adopt other female's babies... humans being just one of them.  So can we change the language? And I am not being too sensitive... and you know why? because I don't want my Colombianito(a) to feel like an "un-natural" baby.  Come on!!!

So before I get too emotional (neither of my friends are here and Tavo is watching some war movie, therefore not paying attention to me) I got to go. Wish me luck !.

Until the next post,

Luz M.

Swimming in an Ocean of Paperwork & almost Drowning

For those of you who are thinking about international adoption and have read/heard about the ocean of paperwork to be completed I have three words for you:  It's all true!!  (or three and a half -'s - if that can be counted as a word)...

So in a case like ours,  you start by filling in the requirements of Alberta Children Services.  That means complete income info, medical info, police clearance etc, etc, etc.  That really doesn't take more than a couple of weeks (assuming you are very disciplined).  Then you put the docs in folder... which is the start of your dossier.  Our little one had a folder from the very beginning.  He/She is very organized. 
And yes... in case you haven't noticed I am a type A personality. 

But the foremost important piece of document you require at the first stage is the Home Study. The Home Study takes normally from 4 - 6 weeks to complete and it is basically an - all about you and your family document - written, signed and stamped by your social worker.  At the end of the interview process she/he makes a recommendation for you to be approved to adopt a baby, or not. 

By the way, I have to add that our social worker totally rocks!! Her name is Liz.  (I won't disclose more info 'cause she doesn't know I'm writing about her... I could get in trouble people!).  At the beginning of the process, Tavo mentioned it was kinda of weird having someone you hardly know sitting in your living room asking questions about you and your family.  I, on the other hand, was okay with full disclosure... nooo problem!! That's me... therefore I am also the one writing the blog.  But anyway... going back to Liz... she was very nice,  she took the weirdness out of the interviews, was very helpful and really speed up the process. 

And let me tell you something else... having a nice social worker is really important! I've heard about awful experiences which made me be thankful for our good luck! Liz is getting not only a Christmas Card but also chocolates from us this year.  Other social workers... are only getting nasty nicknames... or so I hear. 

So after the home study and first stages of paperwork are done,  the package is send to Alberta Children Services.  They take from 6-8 weeks to get back to you with a final decision.  You are either approved or not.  That time did seem like an eternity for us... 8 weeks!!! 2 full months!!  Let me tell you what the 8 week lead time means.  It means you have to go back to the doctor and get police and interpol clearances again because they expire after 6 months.  You know... anything can happen in 6 months... you can become a federal criminal during that time, and the entire CSI team, (yes, the New York, Vegas, LA and all of their friends) might be looking for you... so,  yes... we had to go back to the doctor and renew our police clearances again.   

Then the Colombian requirements have to be completed.  And that is of course my friends... more paperwork! Psychological examination (in case we are nut jobs and our social worker after 4 months of interviews hasn't really noticed) and a bunch of other fun stuff.  Although I have to say... our psychologist will also be getting chocolates this Christmas.

Oh and of course!! The translations!!! There you go... Ocean of paperwork multiplied by two. 

So when it's all done you have to get your docs notarized by an approved notary in the province, then legalized by Alberta Justice (basically AB Justice states that the notary is actually a true one), and then legalized again by the Colombian embassy (which basically states that the legalizing in Alberta is true).  That notarization and legalization times two takes about 4 more weeks.

And this is what you get: 

And this is only one copy.  - In our case, we require 3 of the same (so paperwork times 3).
I could tell you many stories about this pile of documents... funny ones and not so funny ones.  Like the time when the admin person at Alberta Children Services was supposed to send the full dossier back to Calgary and mistakenly send it to Bogota... oh yes... yes... it is true.  When I tracked the document I realized is in freak'n Miami!! But let's not go there...

This blog isn't intended to make you sleep so I'll keep it short.  No stories about the docs.  What I can tell you is that when you are done there is only one thing.... HAPPINESS!!  The sky seems more blue and the sun shines... and the birds sing while the flowers look pretty... even if is 11:30 pm and you are so tired of looking at documents that your eyes hurts and even the dog is bored.  

Pure BLISS,  even if your husband is ready to kill you because you made him go through the list for a third time (in case something is missing) and on top of all you still have the energy to want to take a picture of his happy moment.

But of course... that didn't happen to me.
(Yes... he's a saint. He even smiled and everything,  just don't tell him I said that. )

So if you haven't been following:
(((Alberta Paperwork x 3) + (Colombian Paperwork x 3 ) + translations) x 3 copies =   An UPS envelope.

And that my friends is the engineer in me.  : )
And you engineers... stop going back to see if the equation is right!!! ha!! You are soooo caught!! ha ha ha...
Besides, it's 11:00 pm!! :)

The good news is the envelope left and the good guys at the ICBF Colombia reviewed it really fast.  The not so good news is that they requested a couple changes to our approval letters.  We just received the letters again last Friday and are now going through the notarization times 3 process + translation again, before we can send them back to Bogota. 

I'll keep you all posted!

Until the next post, 

LuzM.